The Communist Cookie Batch
I just made a batch of delicious oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.
As usual, right before I added the chocolate chips I was picking up huge chunks of the raw mixture and delightfully eating it.
Although I will eat them once they are baked, my usual motivation for making cookies is solely based on this cherished moment.
I then added the chocolate chips and started separating my creation in raw, aligned little unbaked cookies: a row of 3, a row of 2
(I was thinking: “ huh, capitalism at it’s peak: these parchemin papers are 3 inches smaller than the conventional cooking pan, so that if you want to use your pan to its full capacity, you need to use two…and so buy more parchemin paper! Tss. But they wont get me, because I’ll just squeeze all the cookies on a single sheet! Gnahaha” Also, since I had already eaten the equivalent of 2 cookies, there was already less stuff to fit on the sheet, but that’s a detail… )
So, back to our rows.
One , two, three
One , two, three
One , two, th-!!!*!&@?!
I DIDN’T HAVE ENOUGH DOUGH LEFT TO MAKE A THIRD FULL COOKIE!!!
And no - I couldn’t just leave the half-started cookie to it’s destiny to burn faster than all of the other cookies on the pan. What were my options?
I didn’t want to eat it because it was full of chocolate chips and I was already full from all that I ate before.
I didn’t want to go through the process of splitting it between all of the other cookies because the pattern on the pan would then be incomplete anyway.
So I did what any good leader would do.
After I had my fair share of raw dough,
I stole a little chunk of dough from every other cookie on the pan
so that I could create The-Full-13th-Cookie.
They didn’t complain.
Sophie For President! (err, Queen? no, I mean, leader, leader, right...)